LGBTQ+ Couples Counseling in Boston
Inclusive, affirming therapy for same-sex and LGBTQ+ couples
Whether you're navigating communication breakdowns, societal pressure, or the unique challenges facing LGBTQ+ partnerships, you deserve a safe, affirming space to reconnect. I offer emotionally focused couples counseling for LGBTQ+ partners in Boston–with heart, skill, and respect for your lived experience.
You’re not in this alone.
Common challenges I help with
Communication breakdowns or conflict
You keep having the same fight, and neither of you feels heard.
Loss of intimacy or emotional disconnection
You feel like roommates more than partners. The physical and emotional closeness has faded.
Coming out differences creating tension.
One of you is more out than the other, and it's causing distance or resentment in the relationship.
Planning for commitment, parenting, or long-term growth
You're ready to build a future together, but you're not aligned on what that looks like–and there aren't always clear templates to follow.
Family dynamics and boundary issues
From navigating unsupportive family members or figuring out how chosen family fits into your lives together.
Rebuilding trust after betrayal
An affair, a broken agreement, a secret. You want to repair, but you know you need more support getting through this.
If any of this resonates, you're not alone. LGBTQ+ couples often face both universal relationship challenges and unique stressors–minority stress, societal discrimination, family rejection, internalized shame. You deserve support that understands both.
How EFT Couples Therapy works & why it's different.
No blame. Really.
I'm not here to figure out who's right. I'm not here to figure out who's right. I'm here to help you both see what's actually happening underneath the arguments–and find your way back to each other.
It's grounded in science
EFT isn't a collection of tips and tricks. It's based on attachment theory and neurobiology–decades of research on what actually makes relationships work. But it's also deeply human. The goal isn't just insight. It's reconnection.
We don't just talk about your problems.
We change patterns in real time. EFT is active. I'll guide you through new ways of interacting right there in session–so you're not just gaining insight, you're building new muscle memory.
What’s really happening: The Cycle
Here's what I've learned after 25 years: there's no villain. There is a pattern.
On the surface, it looks like one person is pushing and the other is pulling away. Or you're both attacking. Or both shutting down.
But underneath? You're both just trying not to get hurt. One of you reaches for connection because you're terrified of being left. The other backs away because they feel like they're failing and can't do anything right. Your protective moves trigger each other's deepest fears. Around and around.
This is The Cycle. And once we can see it, we can change it.
Why work with me
I've been doing this work for over 20 years, and I'm a Certified EFT Therapist and Supervisor.
I have extensive professional experience working with LGBTQ+ couples. I've worked with same-sex couples for many years, and my clients have taught me so much about the unique challenges and dynamics. I'm committed to ongoing LGBTQ+ competency training and creating an affirming space.
I understand what it's like when relationships feel stuck. I've been in cycles myself. That lived experience shapes how I show up for you with empathy, without judgment, and with real hope that things can change.
Kind words from clients.
"As a lesbian couple, we were looking for a couple's therapist who would not only be nonjudgmental, but would treat our marriage with respect and dignity. Paula exceeded our expectations. We came to Paula with our marriage in crisis, we were stuck in a negative loop that we did not know how to get out of. She is caring and insightful and we trusted her to help heal and repair our marriage. She taught us how to recognize when we were getting stuck and how to improve our communication skills. She also helped us rebuild trust, and honor our love for one another."
–A.E.
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What to expect: LGBTQ couple therapy in Boston
01
Free consultation (15 minutes) We'll talk briefly to understand what's going on and answer any questions you have. No pressure, just a conversation.
02
First session We explore your relationship dynamics, your history, and what you're hoping will change. I'll start to get a picture of your cycle–the pattern that keeps you stuck
03
Ongoing sessions We usually meet weekly for 75 minutes to start. This is where the real work begins. We interrupt old patterns and build new ways of connecting.
04
Between sessions Sometimes I'll suggest exercises or readings to support your work outside of therapy. But this isn't homework for homework's sake–it's only if it feels genuinely helpful.
Why online works for couples:
You're already in the same room. Most couples sit together on the couch for our sessions–which is exactly what EFT needs. The therapy happens between the two of you. I'm just the guide.
No commute, no juggling schedules. Whether you're downtown or out in the mountains, you don't have to factor in drive time or figure out who's leaving work early.
It's easier to be consistent. When sessions are more convenient, you're more likely to show up–and consistency is what makes this work.
You might actually be more relaxed. Some couples find it easier to open up from their own space. Home court advantage.
You get a specialist, not just whoever's nearby. With over 20 years of EFT experience, I might be exactly what you're looking for–even if you're not in Asheville.
Couples Intensives
Need to make progress faster?
A Couples Intensive condenses several weeks of therapy into one or two focused days. This can be a good fit if you're in crisis, if scheduling weekly sessions is a challenge, or if you just want to dive deep and do the work. Contact me to learn more.
Serving LGBTQ+ couples across Massachusetts online
I work with LGBTQ+ couples throughout Massachusetts, including Boston, Cambridge, Somerville, Brookline, Newton, Provincetown, Northampton, and beyond. All sessions are online, so location within the state isn't a barrier.
Ready to explore therapy in a space that sees you?
You don't have to keep doing this alone. When you're ready, here's what to do:
Step 1: Book a free consultation or fill out the Compatibility Quiz
Step 2: We'll talk briefly to see if we're a good fit
Step 3: Start the work of reconnecting with one another
Questions about LGBTQ+ couples therapy
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I have extensive experience working with same-sex couples. I welcome all LGBTQ+ couples and am committed to creating an affirming space for your relationship.
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For couples therapy to be effective with EFT, you need to be physically in the same room together during our sessions (even though the sessions themselves are online). The work requires you to turn toward each other, look at each other, and interact in real time. If you're long-distance, we can work together during visits when you're in the same place, but in general, our regular couples therapy sessions require you both to be present together to make progress.
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Yes. See my premarital counseling page for more information.
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Married or not, your relationship matters. You don’t need to be married or planning to ever be married for us to work together.
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We talk. I ask a lot of questions about your relationship, your history, and what brings you in now. I'll start to get a picture of your cycle. No one's on trial. I'm just trying to understand how you got here and what's going to help.
After the first session I will have an individual session with each of you to understand your history and goals more deeply.
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I'm on both of your sides–and on your relationship's side. My job isn't to figure out who's right. It's to help you both see what's really happening underneath the arguments, so you can find your way back to each other.
Have other questions?