Couple Therapy in Asheville, NC
Asheville couples often come to me after years of trying to work things out on their own.
Maybe you've tried to talk it through or given each other space. Maybe you've read the books, listened to the podcasts. But you keep ending up in the same place–and you're starting to lose hope.
You don't have to figure this out alone
Does this sound familiar?
You're navigating a major transition.
Retirement, relocation, becoming empty nesters. Life is changing, and somewhere in the shift, you lost each other.
The connection has faded.
You remember what it used to feel like. Now you're going through the motions–managing the house, the schedules, the logistics–but the intimacy is gone.
You’re building (or blending) a family
New baby, stepkids, co-parenting challenges. The transition is harder than you expected, and it's putting strain on your relationship.
You're recovering from a betrayal.
An affair. A broken promise. Something that shattered the trust you thought was unbreakable. You want to rebuild, but you don't know if you can
You’re questioning whether to stay.
Part of you can't imagine leaving. Part of you can't imagine staying. You need help figuring out what's actually right–not what you "should" do.
Arguments have gotten heated.
Maybe even physical. You're not proud of it, and you don't know how to de-escalate when things get intense.
If any of this resonates, I want you to know: I've worked with couples facing all of this and more. There's a reason you keep getting stuck. And it can change.
What’s really happening: The Cycle
Here's what I've learned after 25 years: there's no villain. There is a pattern.
On the surface, it looks like one person is pushing and the other is pulling away. Or you're both attacking. Or both shutting down.
But underneath? You're both just trying not to get hurt. One of you reaches for connection because you're terrified of being left. The other backs away because they feel like they're failing and can't do anything right. Your protective moves trigger each other's deepest fears. Around and around.
This is The Cycle. And once we can see it, we can change it.
How EFT Couples Therapy works & why it's different.
No blame. Really.
I'm not here to figure out who's right. I'm not here to figure out who's right. I'm here to help you both see what's actually happening underneath the arguments–and find your way back to each other.
It's grounded in science
EFT isn't a collection of tips and tricks. It's based on attachment theory and neurobiology–decades of research on what actually makes relationships work. But it's also deeply human. The goal isn't just insight. It's reconnection.
We don't just talk about your problems.
We change patterns in real time. EFT is active. I'll guide you through new ways of interacting right there in session–so you're not just gaining insight, you're building new muscle memory.
Why work with me
I've been doing this work for over 20 years, and I'm not just a Certified EFT Therapist–I'm a Certified EFT Supervisor, which means I train other therapists in this approach. I know EFT inside and out, and I've seen it work with couples facing every kind of challenge.
But here's what might matter more: I've been where you are. I went through my own painful relationship cycles, which is what drove me to this work in the first place. I bring both professional expertise and personal understanding to every session.
My approach is calm, direct, and respectful. I won't let you slide when it matters, but I also won't push you harder than you're ready to go. I'm here to be alongside you–on your side, and on your relationship's side.
What I specialize in
Some issues I have particular training and experience with:
Recovery from affairs and betrayals
Premarital counseling (or "pre-commitment"–you don't have to be headed for marriage)
LGBTQ+ couples
Blended families and co-parenting challenges
Domestic violence and high-conflict relationships
Life transitions: retirement, empty nest, career changes
Personality differences (I'm certified in Myers-Briggs)
Kind words from clients
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What I believe about relationships.
No relationship is picture-perfect. And here's the surprising thing: that's not actually the goal.
Our connections deepen when we feel loved and accepted for who we truly are. Most of us believe we need to be calm, put-together, and always in a good mood to be worthy of love.
But carrying that expectation around actually creates distance.
Relationships work the same way. When we allow our vulnerable, messy, real selves to be seen by our partners–and they accept our flaws–that's what forges true intimacy.
I love this song by John Prine and Iris Dement because it encapsulates that idea of loving one another “in spite of ourselves.” I invite you to have a listen if you’d like.
What to expect from couples therapy
01
Free consultation (15 minutes) We'll talk briefly to understand what's going on and answer any questions you have. No pressure, just a conversation.
02
First session We explore your relationship dynamics, your history, and what you're hoping will change. I'll start to get a picture of your cycle–the pattern that keeps you stuck
03
Ongoing sessions We usually meet weekly for 75 minutes to start. This is where the real work begins. We interrupt old patterns and build new ways of connecting.
04
Between sessions Sometimes I'll suggest exercises or readings to support your work outside of therapy. But this isn't homework for homework's sake–it's only if it feels genuinely helpful.
Couples Therapy Online Throughout North Carolina
I work with couples across North Carolina via secure video–whether you're in Asheville, the mountains, the Triangle, or anywhere across the state. Most couples sit together for our sessions–same couch, same room–which lets us do the real-time work that makes EFT effective.
Why online works for couples:
You're already in the same room. Most couples sit together on the couch for our sessions–which is exactly what EFT needs. The therapy happens between the two of you. I'm just the guide.
No commute, no juggling schedules. Whether you're downtown or out in the mountains, you don't have to factor in drive time or figure out who's leaving work early.
It's easier to be consistent. When sessions are more convenient, you're more likely to show up–and consistency is what makes this work.
You might actually be more relaxed. Some couples find it easier to open up from their own space. Home court advantage.
You get a specialist, not just whoever's nearby. With over 20 years of EFT experience, I might be exactly what you're looking for–even if you're not in Asheville.
Couples Intensives
Need to make progress faster?
A Couples Intensive condenses several weeks of therapy into one or two focused days. This can be a good fit if you're in crisis, if scheduling weekly sessions is a challenge, or if you just want to dive deep and do the work. Contact me to learn more.
Serving couples throughout Western North Carolina
I work with couples across Western North Carolina and throughout the state, including Raleigh, Asheville, Hendersonville, Black Mountain, Waynesville, Boone, and the surrounding mountain communities. All sessions are currently online, so whether you're in the city or tucked away in the mountains, we can work together anywhere in North Carolina.
If your relationship feels like this…
But you want it to feel like this…
The maybe it’s time to try Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy!
Step 1: Reach out or take the compatibility quiz to see if couples therapy is right for you
Step 2: We'll talk and make sure we're a good fit
Step 3: Start the work of getting out of The Cycle for good
Questions About Couple Therapy
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I had the same question when I started offering it. After years of working with couples online, I can say: yes. The research supports it, and I've seen it firsthand. What matters most is that you and your partner are in the same room together–the therapy happens between you two.
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That's more common than you'd think–and it doesn't mean therapy can't work for you. EFT is different from traditional talk therapy. We're not just teaching communication skills or helping you "understand each other better." We're getting to the root of why you get stuck and changing patterns in real time.
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It depends on what you're working through, but most couples start to feel a shift within the first few sessions. That doesn't mean you're "done"–but you'll have a sense of what we're working on and why. Typical EFT treatment runs 8-20 sessions, though some couples stay longer for deeper work.
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We talk. I ask a lot of questions about your relationship, your history, and what brings you in now. I'll start to get a picture of your cycle. No one's on trial. I'm just trying to understand how you got here and what's going to help.
After the first session I will have an individual session with each of you to understand your history and goals more deeply.
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I'm on both of your sides–and on your relationship's side. My job isn't to figure out who's right. It's to help you both see what's really happening underneath the arguments, so you can find your way back to each other.
Have other questions?